The ‘Fright Night’ Remake

If I blogged on every proposed remake/reboot of classic 80’s and early 90’s movies, then Standard Love Affair would become  entirely devoted to me crying my eyes out. Just off the top of my head I’ve recently read about the studios having a second pop at Commando, Red Dawn, Valley Girl, Conan, Total Recall and Highlander. Luckily, most of the remakes bandied about never really seem to materialise (save Karate Kid).

But some do! Oh, vampires are so sexy right now, and every studio seems to have a bloodsucker flick ready to go in to production. Rumour has it that the unbearable Michael Bay has snapped up my beloved ‘Near Dark’!!! I’d give my eyes to stop him moving on that one. Unfortunately, some slip through the net, and I somehow missed the growing momentum of the ‘Fright Night’ remake, until it was too late.

If I had known sooner, if somebody had just picked up the phone, then I could have been well on my way to LA with a trunk full of petrol bombs way before www.deadline.com could announce that Colin Fucking Farrell has been signed up to play Charlie Brewster’s new vapyric next door neighbour Jerry Dandrige!!

With that kind of casting precedent being set, I’m surprised that director Craig Gillespie hasn’t managed to shoehorn someone like perpetual douchebag Shia Labeouf into the role of Charlie Brewster, and further accelerate my race towards glorious suicide. For those who care to dwell upon this horror any further, the role of Brewster went to Anton Yelchin, the little dude who played Chekov in the new Star Trek movie. Meh!